day 22: now

In the absence of the interview’s shadow, life seems light. But without that weight, I find myself spinning about, dizzy with freedom yet longing just a bit for a tamper to the incredible lightness of being. What can offer the mass I seek?

Only these: my goals, my morals, the urgent task of bettering myself. My views of what constitutes improvement changes each day; the environment I’ve chosen no longer values grades or salaries or status. Instead, I’ve found myself in that place I didn’t realize I sought: that garden of possibility which asks me to cultivate my soul and my mind and my body without catering to separate definitions of worth, but is solely responsible to God and God within me. This, finally, makes sense.


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