day 334: advent

I cannot put my finger on why or in what way, but something is not quite right. I believe it has something to do with sleep and food, and me not having the right amount. Well, tonight I’m hitting the sack early, so this may quickly be remedied.

Despite the queasy weakness, today has been a gift. A and I ventured out in the pre-dawn chill to a quiet Advent mass, then whisked away to pick a tree. We settled on one much larger than last years: two whole feet taller I believe. It’s full as can be: ten boxes of lights and I’m not even halfway up the tree. We made a date of the morning, finishing it off with sweet treats and the rest of the day homebound as we like it.

A hung the icicle lights, so our sunroom is twinklng away. It is mesmerizing. I’m blessed to be on this husband-wife team right now. Some days I feel like I can do anything and everything, but more often than not A has to pick up the slack. Poor guy. I often feel as though I’m playing catch up and I despair I never will for I owe so much. It’s true, I do, but I can’t let the realization be a detriment; I cannot berate myself for it to the point of altered goodwill or resentful guilt. I must act in the spirit of gratitude.

It is difficult to believe November is gone. It is difficult to believe the speed at which the days tick away. I hope that this season I can focus in such a way that the moments, however fleeting, stay in my heart for a long, long time.

A and dad are fixing the toilet right now. Perhaps we’ll be good to go for my middle-of-the-night pee runs; if not, I’ll be really clean when I wake up because each tinkle will require a shower. I don’t mind at the moment; the warm water seems to seep into my cold insides.

advent

 

Gospel Mt 24:37-44
Jesus said to his disciples:
“As it was in the days of Noah,
so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.
In those days before the flood,
they were eating and drinking,
marrying and giving in marriage,
up to the day that Noah entered the ark.
They did not know until the flood came and carried them all away.
So will it be also at the coming of the Son of Man.
Two men will be out in the field;
one will be taken, and one will be left.
Two women will be grinding at the mill;
one will be taken, and one will be left.
Therefore, stay awake!
For you do not know on which day your Lord will come.
Be sure of this: if the master of the house
had known the hour of night when the thief was coming,
he would have stayed awake
and not let his house be broken into.
So too, you also must be prepared,
for at an hour you do not expect, the Son of Man will come.”

off to knit a bit before falling to sleep, praying God will waken my heart.

KT

out

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